Wrought its Ghost upon the Floor

Countless times I go to that weird part of the interwebs that strangely keeps my interest and entertain me in that oh so heavenly good way. I really find this guy funny and I hope he continues to do what he's doing.

And Each Separate Dying Ember

I can start simply by telling you the tale of what I call 'the day the world bowed down'. A make believe collaboration of princess-like fairy tales and other gibberish.

It begins the morning of November 15, 2011, the birth date of my beloved Girlfriend. Girlfriend and I had made plans prior for her birth date. The plan consisted of going to meet her at the court of Lick's and to present her with a Red Velvet Cuppycake that I had slaved over the night before. Nothing else had been arranged. Needless to say, that a baked present to Girlfriend has always been the item of choice, strictly because I believe in the thought that counts above all. Continuing, and this sentence continues from, 'needless to say,' to my utter surprise the cuppycake had been devoured by Family. And Family has done this on occasion to Girlfriend's past birthday treats, regardless of my inability to bake. Not again, I thought, but I'm the moronic idiot who only made a single cupcake, defeated, I decided to whip up another. However, before I even had the chance to return to my bedroom for the Cookbook for Dummies, my cellphone chimed it's 'I'm about Lose My Mind' ring tone.

"Boss!" I heard on the other end from Best Friend. "I'm leaving now for work, is Caretaker there to let me in?"
"Oh, Caretaker was there yesterday and he usually works twice a week. I doubt he is. But the side door should be opened."
"..." silence.
"Ugh...fine. Let me get ready. Call me when you're going to leave so that we can leave together." I groaned, trying not to facepalm until I hung up.

You see about two and a half months ago I started this after school program for youth in our community called, AFTER GAMERZ! Monday through to Friday from 2:00pm to 8:00pm or later we operate the program doing various activities such as tutoring, gym and gaming. It gets more detailed, but I don't wanna get into that. Anyways, because it was Girlfriend's birthday I had begged Best Friend to act as coordinator (my position) and run the program for the day, but because I'm so reluctant to hand the building key over to anyone else, no one had access to the building without someone else with a key being there. Every so often we forget to check the side door, so it's usually opened sometimes. That said, if it wasn't opened, Best Friend had no access to the building and he and the other two volunteers would be screwed.

So I dropped what I was doing, took a five minute shower in lukewarm water and got ready forty minutes later to open the building's doors. In an effort to get there on time, I forgot my cookbook and to bring ingredients from home.
I missed a bus thanks to miscalculation on the bus schedule and waited 20 odd minutes before another came. When it finally did I was so anxious to get the building ready I pulled the cord a stop early and had to walk the rest of the way. Bus drivers kind of hate it when you 'tease' them this way, so I HAD to get off and take the walk. Once I got there, my heart sank. The doors were opened. I rushed in, fists up ready to beat the crap out of any robbers who thought they could rob the place, only to be greeted by Best Friend and Caretaker.
"W-wha-what!?" I stuttered stupidly, dumping my stuff on a nearby chair.
"Yeah, looks like we didn't need you." Best Friend 'apologized' getting straight to work.
"Ugh! No shit. Okay, whatever, I'll just get on baking here. We've got most of the ingredients."

If you guessed there wouldn't be any ingredients, you're right! 

I was so wrong. When I went into the kitchen, there was about 1/3 of the needed items to make a Red Velvet Cupcake in the cupboard. Oh fml. I checked the time, took a breath and tied my shoe laces. 

"Best Friend, I'm going to the market for ingredients. Have this place cleaned for 4pm. Pick up the kids at 3:30pm, give the school this note so they'll give you Youngest. It's nice out so take the kids to the park for roughly 25mins and then have them get ready by 3:55pm. They can't pass the white poles in the park--they know which ones- and make sure you watch them. Give 'em warnings and make sure they keep jackets on and put their backpacks near the pole closest to the bench. Get them back inside on time! Ciao!" 

With instructions given I walked as fast as my chubby stubby legs could carry me all the way to a No Frillz half an hour away. I had written a list of needed ingredients and went searching for the small quantities of things I could find. Within ten minutes I had everything I needed and was standing in line. Needless to say, shopping was the easiest thing I had done all that day. And it had taken such little time, effort and money that I was able to go to Bulk Barn to purchase cute accessories for the cuppycake. Somehow the Time Gods had been on my side. I made it back to the building around 4pm, the same time the children should arrive. My daddy complex got the better of me and even though I should have began baking, I worried as it neared 4:05pm and Best Friend and Children weren't there.
Needless to say, I rushed outside to be greeted by Best Friend and Children crossing the street. One had a bruised cheek and another looked on the brink of tears.
"Oh eM Gee!" I cried. "What happened!?"
"They got into a fight." he started, "With each other?!" I interrupted. "With girls." he spat.
I sighed loudly, and turned on my heels as concern slipped away. You'd think by now, I thought, that this sort of stuff wouldn't have that sort of result. Oh well, I'm just glad Best Friend supports me and my crazy mixed up brain.

As he got their after school snack prepared and ready for them, I began to line up the ingredients I had just bought. As I found bowls and a egg beater I realized, "I don't know this recipe by heart." 
And let me tell you the way I bake is simple; flour, sugar, eggs, water, sugar, salt, baking powder, sugar, vanilla extract, butter and sugar were all a simple cake needed. I even had the right measured amounts memorized, but Red Velvet was another story. So I quickly googled a recipe. And without thinking, I didn't read any comments or feedback left by other online users who had followed the recipe. About half way through my baking process, I realized the recipe didn't feel like the one I had done the night before. I shrugged, mixing and following the instructions. Once I put the cake in the oven, I cleaned my hands and left for 5 minutes before coming back down to a kitchen that smelled like lightly burned pancakes.
"What the fack!" I cried, rushing to the oven. I pulled out the cupcake sheet, (slightly burning my fingers as the oven mitts I wore were both meant for the left hand) and placed muffin brown cupcakes on the stove top. Devastated that the cupcakes weren't a pretty shade of red or even a pink, I let my heart break at the thought of given this disaster to Girlfriend. I tasted them and my heart sank farther. They tasted awful...!
"No! I will not be defeated!" I raised my fists, "By the POWER OF GRAYssssskull?...what the fack does he say?" I'd google it later.

So I went online yet again...and none of the recipes I'd found...matched. Some would say 3 cups of flour or 1.5 cups, and yet still say, 'for 12 servings'. I just don't understand baking. After what felt like an eternity, I chose two, with the intention of following one's ingredients and the other's instructions. That was the dumbest thing I have ever done. Aside from only making one cuppycake. I put a sheet of cupcake batter into the oven and no sooner had I done so had I heard a hiss. I checked on them to see that the cupcakes had 'exploded' and caved in.
"What the..." I couldn't even mutter my favorite saying of the day as I pulled out the mess. "Noooo!" I had less than an hour to make a new batch. I worked hard and fast, but I must have been doing something wrong in my efforts. The same thing happened AGAIN and the cupcakes sank in. 
"Why why why!?" I begged to know, seeing that it was already ten minutes to seven. The program would be over and I'd have no time to make it to Lick's to see Girlfriend.
I probably broke down for a second before manning up. "Okay Mitchell, you've been in worst situations." I rushed up the stairs to google one last recipe, but on my way down, Baby was standing on the top of the steps. I hadn't seen her as I came dashing down and in an attempt to dodge out of the way, I tripped and fell down a flight of stairs. I would not been K.O'd of the game that easily and limped back into the kitchen. 
The fourth batch of cupcakes were the worst. I threw in the white towel and surrendered.
I had no money or present for Girlfriend and I felt like shit.
"What are these?" Lovey asked. 
I sighed and shook my head, "Cupcakes." I grumbled, washing bowls for the umpteenth time. "They're all garbage though." I added tired.
I turned around to witness her taking a bite and feeding Baby some too. "These taste alright." She said.
"Huh? No...those are the first ones I made. They're burnt and nasty."
"They taste fine to me."
I didn't know whether or not to believe her, so I asked around. Everyone was telling me that they tasted great. But I'm a princess and my royal subjects are suppose to make me feel like I'm one badass mofo.
"No...way. Are you tellin' me the truth?"
The first batch was perfect? I decorated one carefully, covering it with a cream cream swirled icing and sprinkling it with red candy glittery stuff. And lastly a rose. It looked so pretty, but I just knew Girlfriend would think it was crappy. The last touch was to carefully drop it in the center of a see through paint can container. (much more kawaii desu then it sounds.) With some time to spare I placed the gift in my back pack and tripped walking up stairs. Bruised and battered, I left the building with Best Friend. The second I stepped outside, he grabbed my hand and yanked me down the street as our bus was approaching. "Le GASP! The cuppycake..." was upside down in it's container. "NOOOOOOOOOOO!"
I didn't care that I was being a drama qu33n on the bus or that everyone was looking at me. I worked so damn hard on that.
Luckily, it didn't look that messed up and the icing didn't rub off or anything. It does didn't look swirly anymore.




As I arrived at the mall, I checked texts that said I should take the bus to her workplace. Somehow too lazy to wait, but active enough to walk, I decided I'd arrive on foot. However, I had no idea which direction Lick's was from where I was standing and I couldn't, for the life of me, remember any other exits. So I randomly began a journey.
Now right about now I bumped into Other Friends, but that's no interesting. So...TIME SKIP to the now.

I finally made it to Lick's and saw her in her work uniform mopping the floor and I swear I got all love sick thinking how gorgeous she was. I probably smiled, I don't even know as I nervously intruded on her territory. I sat where she told me and waited nervously not to be in the presence of people she knew. I am a loser.
About an hour after, I was told to leave so they could close up and she told me to wait next door at...
where'd we wait...fuck! That restaurant...oh geez, this is gonna haunt me....with those weird cups that aren't cups!! FAAAACK!

damnit...this blog is ruined!

I gave her the damned cupcake and told her shit and she loved it and took picture. The fucking end...

It was In the Bleak December

It's so crazy how all my doubts can be thrown away, when she says 'I love you' before I do.

Ah, Distinctively I Remember

[raw & unedited]
another entry from my diary

I Wanna kiss those Lips!sixth entry

               

You’re still the same old you, but I’m still falling in love with you. It’s so difficult. I’m too young to know what true love is, right? Plenty of fish in the sea…broken hearts heal. No.

I really just want you.

Because I love you. A lot.

I’ve been thinking…I’m sorry I messed up our relationship. Sorry I was too scared to—as well as embarrassed—to lose my virginity to you, but at the time I didn’t think it mattered. Sorry I never told you what was wrong, because I really thought and still think, my little problems are too dumb to be bothering you with and that you can easily see what’s wrong. Sorry for never showing you my tears and telling you my fears. That’s because I always wanted to seem strong to you. I’m sorry I wasn’t the right person for you and I really hope you’re happy.

If I could tell you these things I would. But it’s really just my pride.

Oh, there’s one more thing I always wanted to say to you, Miss, I really like your lips. And I think I stare at them sometimes and I got to stop myself from leaning in and kissing you. Being an idiot and reclaiming you like a character from my stories. I’m smiling at myself now. I really am I big love sick puppy. Why’d I fall in love with you of all people? You’re my friend, I see you all the time. Maybe that’s why my heart won’t heal. No, that’s not it. It’s because I gave it to you. You can keep it, okay?

& Nothing More.

It's completely foolish. How a princess can only be a queen with her king.
[raw & unedited]

Heartbreakthird entry

One day I’ll let the smile be real.              

There are some things I really don’t get. So I always assume them. I always assume because it keeps me from having one of my daily ‘panic attacks’ and being paranoid. You might not know this, but I’m incredibly paranoid. There’s not really a great explaination as to why, put I know I’m a paranoid downer freak. I’ve been told.

Anyways, like I was saying, there’s some things I don’t get. Like why at the mention of her name I get this lump thing in my throat and the tears wanna explode from my eyes. I don’t understand that. All I know is, I want it to go away.

My cousin, Ronnie, says that that lump in my throat’ll go away if I just ‘man up and grow some balls.’ Well, that’s my make of it anyways. I’m too scared to do so. Because my assumptions cannot possibly be any worse than the actuality. I rather not know why she left me. I rather be left in the dark with my paranoia and assumptions.

Like what? Well I’ve come to this conclusion:you leave somebody when you hate them, isn’t that right? I’ve been told that I am correct.  So then, somebody tell me why she is still so close to my heart? Why’s she’s still in my life.  I think it’s because I like her so damn much, I know that. So what’s her reasons? Hahahha, I don’t wanna know.

My godsister, Monique, says that it’s her gothic powers of confusion. That she just makes me think that she likes me so that I won’t leave and spend more time with her instead. Haha, that’s just Momo’s jealousy talking though. I know that.

What do I think? I do not know. I try not to think about it. Because then that lump comes back…and I end up crying.

My friend, Marcus, said that I should just ask her. He tried to make me feel better. He said there’s a difference in me and that he wants me to be happy again, but…I’m too scared.

Sometimes I have all this courage, but I think it’s limited. I waste it on silly outbursts and talking to people on the streets.

Some days ago, I was nearly better. I felt that everything would be alright, but then…Risha, my friend, she let it slip that she got a boyfriend. I laughed. At myself. I didn’t understand. How could she easily let me go like that? Really…what was wrong with me. What is wrong with me? I don’t get it.

It was Marcus who said that it seemed kind of quick…and that maybe they might have been seeing each other behind my back. I laughed. Because I refused to cry. Why’d he say that? I know her, she would never do that. And that’s not something I’m just saying to make myself feel better. I don’t spare myself like that.

Then, Jermaine, he’s supposed to be my friend. Some friend. What he said to me, shatter the heart that’s trying to heal.

“You’re so difficult. I can see why she left you.”

I’m kind of lonely now. And each time I tell her that I hate her, it’s because I think, ‘she’s got somebody better.’ Or I hear the name I’m beginning to hate, ‘Bill’. So I say that to make sure pent up anger doesn’t let me attack people again. Sorry bro.

So, I still don’t understand it, and I’ll continue to assume. I’ll continue to come up with reasons as to why she left me while my godsister, cousins and friends try to get the new me back to the old me. Why’d you leave me Wendi? No…why did I let you?

Because for once, I tried to think of your happiness and ended up crushing my own.

Only This

www.fairytalevomit.blogspot.com

[raw & unedited]

from me to you

i'm always crying over the stupid little things i let bother me.
that there's nothing special about me.
or why can't i see, what is it that you see in me?
or how nothing's like it used to be.
or how i believe you've fallen outta love with me.

everyday i say i love you.
i say it because baby, i do.
i really hope you love me too.
and that sayin' 'i know' makes it true.

sometimes i think you've come to hate me.
you'll move on, don't need me.
only wanted to use me.
i'll wake up and you've left me.
packed your bags and abandoned me.
last few words, 'why couldn't you see
'that you were never good enough for me?'

all the time i think, i'm not your one.
you yell at me that 'we're done.'
i'll lie broken in the sun.
tears will continue to run.

more or less i think i'm the only one dreaming of you 'n me.
how our lives are meant to be.
how i want you to love me.
how i want you to be with me.


i don't know why i've said all this.
probably a hit 'n miss.
i don't wanna lose all this.
i don't wanna lose all this.

`Tapping at my Chamber Door

[Please note that Travis has quite the multifarious mind which is both perplexing and difficult to write. Getting into character was more of a task than it should have been and although Travis Erik Layne is my own fictional character, I wanted future readers of his story to be able to truly sympathize over him. I do hope that my words have stayed true to his personality and that you understand his pain. I also hope that I have succeeded in creating quite a captivating poem, like I aimed for.]

you know what i want? just fairytales & lies.
to be chased & captured. deceived by your disguise.
you don't have to know me. i know that you don't care.
but can't you just pretend to love me & wipe away my tears?
maybe it's a lot to ask for. especially when i act this way.
but i desperately need your attention; baby, please just obey.
some, they call me needy, an illness & disease.
but you're the only cure, darling. love is your expertise.

would you like to see my blood shed? i'd end myself for you.
but you should already know that. for you, there's nothing i won't do.
punish me hard, baby, please. don't i deserve it?
beaten up & whipped until i look like shit.
you know i want to be treated like dirt.
until all i know is hurt.
tear my hair out, stab my skin.
steal my virginity. though i'd let you in.
cum inside me, cover me in your piss & spit.
dirty my body. i love the smell of it.
can't you just pretend to love me? i feel so pathetic & used.
& being told that you 'need me.' leaves me mentally abused.

maybe i'm a sadomasochist. because this shit is what i need.
caged & locked up like a pet; i don't ever want to be freed.
baby, i'm wrapped around your finger, a slave to only you.
just a body for you to enjoy & completely slice through.
can't you just pretend to love me? you might even fall in love.
look. i cut my name into my body; right above my heart.
this way we'll always be together; unable to be apart.
i will fucking force you to need me like i do.
i will convince you.

i'll be like the mermaid princess who loved the human prince.

`'Tis Some Visitor,' I Muttered,

Rapping at my Chamber Door

More things that inspire me and make Princess Mitchell this amazingly conceited.

As Of Some One Gently Rapping

I have not the foggiest idea where the slogan, 'what moves you' came from, but I've indeed heard of it from a commercial. What moves me & what makes me, me.?

creativity & daring to cross society's standards

childlike innocence

dastardly good looks :P

the beauty in everything

heartbreak

grey is...my monochromatic life

nerdy

love & being in it

imagination

Suddenly There Came a Tapping

Why can't we realize that beauty comes in all form. In all genders? And that we shouldn't aspire to be like the people we see, but be the person that's seen. Ourselves and no one else.

This could lead to so much more. And yet I find this oddly attractive, regardless of all the suffering it brings and causes to a young woman with absolutely this in her head as 'ultimate beauty'. Someone once said it right, 'great beauty comes with great sacrifice.' Or something like that.

While I Nodded, Nearly Napping

Hanzel & Gretel

 Brothers Grimm

Once upon a time, there live a rather poor woodcutter. He lived in a small cottage, in the middle of a huge forest with his two precious children; his son, Hansel and daughter Gretel. When he remarried, his awful second wife often ill-treated the children and left them without supper.

   "There is not enough food in this house for the four of us. There are too many mouths to feed! We must get rid of those two little brats," she declared to her timid husband. And she kept on trying to persuade him to abandon his children in the forest.

   "Take them many, many miles from home. So far that they can never find their way back to us!" And she sweetly added, "maybe someone will find them and give them a home. Even raise them like their own" The downcast woodcutter didn't know what to do. "They are my children." was all he could utter.

"And I am your wife." The bitch retorted.

Hansel, who, one evening, had overheard his parents' conversation, comforted Gretel.

   "Don't worry! If they do leave us in the forest, we'll find the way home," he said. Gretel nodded, always comforted by her brothers words. "Just in case, we should prepare ourselves."

They both slipped out of the house and filled their pockets with little pebbles and rocks, then went to bed.
 

All night long, the woodcutter's wife harped on and on and on at her husband until, he could no longer bear to hear her annoying voice. With big fat tears in his eyes, he led Hansel and Gretel away into the forest. But as they went into the depths of the trees, Hansel and his sister dropped a pebble here and there on the mossy green ground. At a certain point, the two children found they really were alone: the woodcutter had plucked up enough courage to desert
them, had mumbled an excuse and was gone.

   Night fell but the woodcutter did not return. Gretel began to sob bitterly. Although she and her brother had prepared for this, she had never really expected it. Hansel too felt scared but he tried to hide his feelings and comfort his sister the best he could.

   "Don't cry, sister. Trust in me! I swear I will get us back home even if Father doesn't come back for us!" Luckily the moon was full that night and Hansel waited till its cold light filtered through the trees and they could see better.

   "Now give me your hand!" he said. "We'll get home safely, you'll see!" 

The tiny pebbles stood out in the moonlight, and the children found their way home. They crept through a half open window, without wakening their parents. Cold, tired but thankful to be home again, they slipped into bed and fell instantly asleep.

   Next day, when their stepmother discovered that Hansel and Gretel had returned, she went into a rage. Stifling her anger in front of the children, she locked her bedroom door, reproaching her husband for failing to carry out her orders. The weak woodcutter protested, torn as he was between shame and fear of disobeying his cruel wife. The wicked stepmother kept Hansel and Gretel under lock and key all day with nothing for supper but a sip of water and some hard bread. All night, husband and wife quarreled, and when dawn came, the woodcutter led the children out into the forest once again.

   Hansel, however, had not eaten his bread, and as he walked through the forest, he left a trail of crumbs behind him to mark the way. But the little boy had forgotten about the hungry birds that lived in the forest. When they saw him, they flew along behind and in no time at all, had eaten all the crumbs without him realizing. Again, with a lame excuse, the woodcutter left his two children by themselves.

   "I've left a trail, like last time!" Hansel whispered to Gretel, consolingly. But when night fell, they saw to their horror, that all the crumbs had gone.

   "I'm frightened!" wept Gretel bitterly. "I'm cold and hungry and I want to go home!"

   "Don't be afraid. I'm here to look after you!" Hansel tried to encourage his sister, but he too shivered when he glimpsed frightening shadows and evil eyes around them in the darkness. All night the two children huddled together for warmth at the foot of a large tree.

   When dawn broke, they started to wander about the forest, seeking a path, but all hope soon faded. They were well and truly lost. On they walked and walked, till suddenly they came upon a strange cottage in the middle of a glade.

   "This is chocolate!" gasped Hansel as he broke a lump of plaster from the wall.

   "And this is icing!" exclaimed Gretel, putting another piece of wall in her mouth. Starving but delighted, the children began to eat pieces of candy broken off the cottage.

   "Isn't this delicious?" said Gretel, with her mouth full. She had never tasted anything so nice.

   "We'll stay here," Hansel declared, munching a bit of nougat. They were just about to try a piece of the biscuit door when it quietly swung open.

   "Well, well!" said an old woman, peering out with a crafty look. "And haven't you children a sweet tooth?"

   "Come in! Come in, you've nothing to fear!" went on the old woman. Unluckily for Hansel and Gretel, however, the sugar candy cottage belonged to an old witch, her trap for catching unwary victims. The two children had come to a really nasty place.

   "You're nothing but skin and bones!" said the witch, locking Hansel into a cage. I shall fatten you up and eat you!"

   "You can do the housework," she told Gretel grimly, "then I'll make a meal of you too!" As luck would have it, the witch had very bad eyesight, an when Gretel smeared butter on her glasses, she could see even less.

   "Let me feel your finger!" said the witch to Hansel every day to check if he was getting any fatter. Now, Gretel had brought her brother a chicken bone, and when the witch went to touch his finger, Hansel held out the bone.

   "You're still much too thin!" she complained. When will you become plump?" One day the witch grew tired of waiting.

   "Light the oven," she told Gretel. "We're going to have a tasty roasted boy today!" A little later, hungry and impatient, she went on: "Run and see if the oven is hot enough." Gretel returned, whimpering: "I can't tell if it is hot enough or not." Angrily, the witch screamed at the little girl: "Useless child! All right, I'll see for myself." But when the witch bent down to peer inside the oven and check the heat, Gretel gave her a tremendous push and slammed the oven door shut. The witch had come to a fit and proper end. Gretel ran to set her brother free and they made quite sure that the oven door was tightly shut behind the witch. Indeed, just to be on the safe side, they fastened it firmly with a large padlock. Then they stayed for several days to 
eat some more of the house, till they discovered amongst the witch's belongings, a huge chocolate egg. Inside lay a casket of gold coins.

   "The witch is now burnt to a cinder," said Hansel, "so we'll take this treasure with us." They filled a large basket with food and set off into the forest to search for the way home. This time, luck was with them, and on the second day, they saw their father come out of the house towards them, weeping.

   "Your stepmother is dead. Come home with me now, my dear children!" The two children hugged the woodcutter.

   "Promise you'll never ever desert us again," said Gretel, throwing her arms round her father's neck. Hansel opened the casket.

   "Look, Father! We're rich now . . . You'll never have to chop wood again."

   And they all lived happily together ever after.

Hanzel & Gretel

Over Many a Quaint & Curious Volume of Forgotten Lore

  This is how it all began.

Once upon a time...

Once upon a time, in the far away kingdom unknown to many, there lived quite the abnormal royal family. And let me be the first to introduce myself as your royal highness, Princess Mitchell. Although the title of princess is generally used to distinguish female; and furthermore, it tends to have denotations rather than being associated with predominance, I find that the word prince has more of masculine sound instead of a light and almost feathery one like princess portrays. In any case, a general consensus has been made that I will and forever remain with the title of princess as I deem fit.

Continuing with this incredibly factual tale, I am the only child to my half French mother, Jacqueline Burton and 'no longer with us' father, Carlisle Burton (who was named by my grandmother and grandfather after Carlisle, Cumbria, a settlement within Cumbria, England.)You can say it is my mother's way of nurturing me that I have such a fairy tale look on everything. And it is this curse that I suffer through my everyday life.

It was just a few days ago that I had celebrated my 20th birthday with some of my closest friends. 20 is a milestone in one's life; I see it as the proper bridge between adolescence and adulthood, not quite a teenager and yet, not quite an adult. And it also marked the promise (my sometimes foolish and despicable) mother had made. One I had never taken quite seriously. Queen Jacqueline always told me I was her, 'poupée' as well as granted wish. And admitting that isn't something every parent tells her child I saw it more as her way of saying 'miracle'. And the story she told me, honestly speaking, I had thought was her clever way of telling me a fairy tale that incorporated my name to entertain and amuse me.

When the story would conclude, she'd kiss my head and wish me pleasant dreams. And that is all I've ever had. Only pleasant dreams. As if the story was more than just a tale.

But continuing from where I left off, I celebrated my 20th birthday some days ago. The festivities were fit for a princess of my standards and I had been enjoying my party up until it had been crashed terribly by a man in black so dark, his cloak and shadow blended. His face was covered and masked by a darkness that I could not get a proper look. He crackled, curled long fingers and croaked, "How impolite not to invite your own father!"

It was that exact moment my world came crashing further down and crumbled around me. The stupid bedtime story my mother would recite nightly wasn't just that, but in reality, her reminiscing. In other words, it was true and I was totally and still am, royally screwed.

It all happened so rapidly. The ball ended quickly. My party guests fled for their lives and left me standing there amongst the rubble with my partner in crime, Sir Dazzle McGrath, mouth opened catching flies and eyes wide. No sooner had he came he vanished into the night.

"So Princess, forget to invite one of your fairies to the party?" he teased inappropriately.

Dazzle has been my mate since my birth...or voodoo magic manipulation creation. (Happy Voodoo Magic Manipulation Creation Day!) He's an eccentric, loud, big mouth, flamboyant, trouble maker. I call him transsexual; he says he's just like me. I prefer Princess, he prefers being a he/she.

Which is completely acceptable. I find nothing wrong with Dazzle's life style, personality and choices. Who am I to judge? Though I find myself more open minded than most people tend to be.

Still, with my mouth gaping and my heart pounding; I could not fathom how this could make any sense. Believe me, I could not be making this up if I tried.

I was a doll and with the help of some unexplainable magic used by a talking frog, I was transformed into a real boy. How fucking fantastic.

And Dazzle's mocking was not making the situation any lighter.

"You know what we have to do?" He suddenly said, two inches away from my face.

The guy has absolutely no respect for an individual's personal space.

"And what might that be?" I snapped back.

I had my doubts that he could offer anything close to help.

"We have to find that sorcerous frog get him to enchant you some more and keep you from become a cute dolly. HEY! If we don't succeed, can I keep you as a plaything?"

Absolutely eccentric, isn't he. Sadly, I couldn't help but agree. If I wanted to continue living I had to find the beast who claimed to be my father.

That is exactly what I planned to do as well.

I can tell you how long Mother cried when I told her Dazzle and I planned to find the talking frog. I can tell you, although I will not. I rather not bore you.

Through her tears, she insisted we took the Royal Stallion Cars. I think they're imported from Italy or some far, far away Kingdom. 
With everything packed and both of us determined, we set off on an adventure to restore the peace and keep me whole.

And, that my friends, is how everything that I will, on a weekly basis, update, came to be.

While I Pondered, Weak & Weary

 

"only a kiss to steal your voice."

Long, long, long ago there lived a King and Queen whose deepest wish were to have a son. One, who would some day take over and rule their Kingdom. However, the Queen was unable to bear children and this grieved the King and Queen both. It was one particular warm night that the Queen, who in her childlike manner, combed and brushed her favorite plaything, (a doll with curly hair) did a tiny, ugly, wet frog leap onto the balcony where she had been sitting comfortably. And since frogs are such magical creatures, the Queen was not hesitant to pick up the green creature and make a wish.
 
"Oh, sir frog, what I wouldn't give up to bear a son." she told him in a sigh. 
Surprisingly the creature said in such a delicate tone, "I shall fulfill your wish." She had gasped, but was not troubled by the talking frog. 
"Can you truly do as you say, sir frog?" to which he replied, "This and more." The Queen filled with joy put the little frog down on got on her knees begging for the frog to give her a child right this minute. The Queen's plead touch the frog's heart and he bewitched the Queen's precious doll. Before their eyes the toy turned into a bouncing baby boy. Overwhelmed and filled with great ecstasy, the Queen wept fat tears of happiness and cuddled her newborn son. Then the little frog hopped on her shoulder and croaked, "in return for my services all I ask of you is your lovely voice. Only a kiss, to steal your voice." The Queen was absolutely repulsed and loathed the idea. Bitterly she fanned the frog from her shoulder and tried repeatedly to step on him and crush the life from him. He retreated from her brutal attacks, but his voice and these words were left in the air. 
"You will regret this day, your majesty. For when your prince is two decades, he shall seek me, his true father. For the punishment of your crime is that his life will be short, it will be filled with misfortune and again a doll he will be."
But the Queen mocked the frog's warning thinking 'Who knows whether that will ever happen' and thought nothing more of it.
The next day, the Queen told her King of the miracle that had happened and they named the young baby, Mitchell. a young beauty that the royal family presented with pride. They spoiled him and treated him like a little prince. And he lived happily ever after. For the time being. The end.

Once Upon a Midnight Dreary

A Weekend of Firsts

What can I say that probably hasn't been said?

Let's start with the first of all firsts!

I went to my fucking first Furry Convention (Held at the Double Tree Hotel) thanks to my lovely and overly friendly (a polite way of saying flirtatious) girlfriend; aka my roomie and Red Velvet.
And it was the most awesome thing I have ever experienced.
The people I've socialized with were the most amazing people to ever talk to, incidentally, the most hyper and colorful lot as well. I felt like I could be me, speak continuously, be honest and get distracted easily and be accepted. That was the number one reason this con was so well done.
However, at times, I did feel out of place, and that was only because as a complete n00bie to cons and furries in general; I had no idea who people like Zen, Blindsight and Kitty were and hearing their names spoken so commonly made me go o_O? at most parts. But that's where the friendly furries are reintroduced, as they pointed guest speakers out, or even gave me websites to stalk mentioned names at. I thank you for this once again. And it is because of this that I have created this FA account. I hope I do justice with it.

My accommodations at the hotel was set up by my roomie were notwithstanding. Another first. (Never stayed in a hotel with friends and not family.) Now hear me out about the notwithstandings. We shared a room with two other guests, Benjamin Wolf and Shadow Kitty and they were fun to hang around~
However, housekeeping needs to step their game up and not leave notes about not cleaning our room. I didn't leave my house to make messes in public places to not have maids not do their paid to do jobs. Cookies were fucking delicious. That's how they get you.

I may have come off as a easily exhausted lazy ass, but I want to clarify that I didn't eat when I was seen. So in order to keep my energy up I needed to be moving or drinking water or doing something entertaining. And now you know. And knowing is half the battle motherfuckers.

I drank too. Another first. I have one cup of lemonade vodka mix and got tipsy. I have no tolerance or countenance. I was told I should see a doctor...

I'm throwing in my two cents about the games room. Holy fuck. Yes! Do that more. I had so much fun talking to others and playing games. Thanks to that I'm gonna buy Bloody Roar 4, Left 4 Dead 2, RockBand and Marvel vs Capcon. Yes! Reminding you who I am, I was the one singing or screwing up on Guitar or banging the drums. I have three new favorite songs.

I come to the raves now.
I dance like a crazy acid taking bitch and we know those on the dance floor loved it. You need at least one crazy, right?
The DJs rocked. End of story. If I praise them, their egos will swell and they'll become jerks. (cyberwulfe)

The fursuits were all so expertly made and proudly worn. The heads worn were worn with confidence; I make not a ridiculous or megalomanicial claim. Those who were there saw that and those who weren't cannot begin to fathom. It also blew my mind how many people made their own suits and heads and I just had to get emails for skype or msn tutorials. I am formative to make one. Believe me. But now I rant. In fact everything about this con was so good that I swear I cannot write anything quintessential to what this con was. So I give up. (I'm the best writer ever!)

I must come to a close.

In conclusion. Best thing ever. Next year is a definite thing. I hope my dreams of going to the convention in Montreal becomes a reality.


O yeah, I apologize in advance for my rather colorful language. I swear. I like to swear. I probably break rules.

I'm bored with this journal now.
Love you babe.
Peace!

she's on her way