`Tapping at my Chamber Door

[Please note that Travis has quite the multifarious mind which is both perplexing and difficult to write. Getting into character was more of a task than it should have been and although Travis Erik Layne is my own fictional character, I wanted future readers of his story to be able to truly sympathize over him. I do hope that my words have stayed true to his personality and that you understand his pain. I also hope that I have succeeded in creating quite a captivating poem, like I aimed for.]

you know what i want? just fairytales & lies.
to be chased & captured. deceived by your disguise.
you don't have to know me. i know that you don't care.
but can't you just pretend to love me & wipe away my tears?
maybe it's a lot to ask for. especially when i act this way.
but i desperately need your attention; baby, please just obey.
some, they call me needy, an illness & disease.
but you're the only cure, darling. love is your expertise.

would you like to see my blood shed? i'd end myself for you.
but you should already know that. for you, there's nothing i won't do.
punish me hard, baby, please. don't i deserve it?
beaten up & whipped until i look like shit.
you know i want to be treated like dirt.
until all i know is hurt.
tear my hair out, stab my skin.
steal my virginity. though i'd let you in.
cum inside me, cover me in your piss & spit.
dirty my body. i love the smell of it.
can't you just pretend to love me? i feel so pathetic & used.
& being told that you 'need me.' leaves me mentally abused.

maybe i'm a sadomasochist. because this shit is what i need.
caged & locked up like a pet; i don't ever want to be freed.
baby, i'm wrapped around your finger, a slave to only you.
just a body for you to enjoy & completely slice through.
can't you just pretend to love me? you might even fall in love.
look. i cut my name into my body; right above my heart.
this way we'll always be together; unable to be apart.
i will fucking force you to need me like i do.
i will convince you.

i'll be like the mermaid princess who loved the human prince.